We miss you. So much.
This past week I've been reliving our final days with you, Sophie. Reliving the final weeks of appointments and ultrasounds. Reliving you moving inside me until your body gave up. Reliving the hope and dreams we had for you. It all seems like it happened yesterday, but at the same time it feels like it's been decades since I got to hold you.
As I'm thinking about each moment we had with you, I'm looking into your little brother's eyes with tears in mine, and thinking... He's here because of what you went through! He wouldn't be here if you were born perfectly healthy or if your heart hadn't failed you. He is your legacy. He is the "something good" that came from "something bad." He is who God gave us to help us go on.
We continue to go on and celebrate the impact your short existence had on our lives. Yes, I sometimes find myself wishing I could be the person I was before we lost you. Without a worry. Not afraid of losing a child or living a life of managing my grief. But that's where it ends. Your Daddy and I were changed so much with the loss of you, Sophie. Because of this, we go on in faith. We live a life of purpose and focus. A life He has planned for us until we can see you and hold you again.
We wish we could be throwing your second birthday party, but we know the one you're getting in heaven is better than we could ever imagine. We will celebrate you and remember you the best way we know how. We will continue to hold you close in our hearts as you are forever a part of us.
You are forever our angel, His angel... His praises you will sing.
Happy Birthday Sophie.
We love you!